Slow if you haven't. =S
Recently stress is building up so quickly that I can hardly breathe. Every teacher are giving me a darn hard time, so now I'm starting to loathe every single session in school.
Almost everyday I dreamt of school. I remembered once I dreamt of Mdm Prema scolding me for not handing up an assignment. Teachers have turned slightly psychotic then before; They flew into a rage without any warnings or in my class' case, one teacher abandoned the class for a week.
My health is deteriorating as well. Puked last week's Thursday, pain in colon acted up again the next day & diarrhoea for the entire day on Monday. The radiology scan is on next Saturday. Sometimes it's scary to see myself all weak and wobbly, and started worrying about whether I would faint in the toilet.
Friends are having some sort of hard time as well. Everyday I hear more sighing and crying. Gives me heartaches.
Parents are also building stress on me.
However I don't seem to be the kind of person who will turn to my friend and pour out all my sobs. It doesn't seem appropriate for me to do so. They have their own worries. Why should I tell them my problems and make them worry for me as well?
Therefore my only source of letting out is to either blog, or write a journal. You see more happy entries in my blog. Almost all the depressed ones are in my journal. After all, paper has more patient than a person.
And recently I found a new friend. She cheers me up whenever I turn to her - Diary of Anne Frank.
Yes, she is a book.
Every time I read this book, I feel the happiness level rising up. Because I know that somewhere in this world, there is someone like me or even worse than me. I should feel blissed instead of moaning about problems.
I'm not a moaner anyway.
Anne Frank has somewhat a similar character like myself, cept that I can bathe with hot water everyday, have more allowance than her and doesn't need to go into hiding. I'm much more fortunate than her.
To sum it up, my days have never been any good. But I always managed to laugh it off and comfort myself with "tomorrow will be a better day than today".
But there is something that I like about my changing life. I took 2 buses to school everyday to school for a change and therefore have more time to indulge in reading Anne Frank. This way she cheers me up even more.
And on top of allllllll the cheerlessness, I took some random photos of classmates to take comfort in lessons that I abhorred.
Every 1/2 hour passed by, I will strike off one on my paper. It REALLY did cheer me up a lot.
And today, enjoying watching the girls playing floor-ball during PE.Labels: pictures, school, updates
